The Lovers

The Lovers Tarot Card Image

Love is beautiful, love is kind, love is accepting and true – but not all proclamations of love are truly loving. The Lovers card reminds us to seek meaningful connections and relationships be they romantic or plutonic. The card reminds us that love is not lust, it is not a competition, and it is never a one way street. Trying to make people love us will never be as successful as seeing what is loveable in others.

Choices

The image on this Lovers card shows a situation where love is wanted but unable to flow. The central figure wears his heart on his chest – he wants to receive love but does he truly want to give it? His indecision on who to choose speaks of self interest. It tells us he will put his wants ahead of others. He wants to receive what these ladies have to give, but sadly he may be unable to give in return. Real love is disciplined. Life has many temptations and people have many choices. Genuine love of another means we will master will our power over temptation. A person who can truly love others says no other attractions, addictions, and unhealthy life choices.

In this version of The Lovers card, rejection is a central issue illustrated by the two women sensing they are not in a balanced relationship. Their backs are turned but they are holding on to the concept of love, proud and unwilling to let go. Deep down perhaps they know their love cannot returned as deserved. Pride can leave us to hold on too long in love. Two people must be equally capable of giving and receiving love for a relationship to be healthy. Giving love to one who cannot truly love back hurts immensely, especially if that hurt is dismissed or minimised by a love interest.

Values

Rather than gushing proclamations of love, this card invites us to delve into the way we give love to others. Be introspective and willing to improve or be brave enough to ask your loved ones to improve if needed. If you are not currently in a relationship give yourself the gift of time when seeking a mate. Let go of pride and look to the core of values of each person you meet. See selfish and difficult behaviours for what they are and walk away, you won’t find love there.

When asking yourself if you love a person, look beyond the superficial. Looks, social status, financial position may certainly gain admiration but admiration is not love. The things we love about people are their actions, their values, their beliefs, the very core of who they are. And when you love these things about a person love can truly be life long. For when all else fades with the ravishes of time, our convictions, our kindness, our inner beauty is what remains and it remains oh so lovable.

Communication

The Lovers card reminds us that open communication, vulnerability and honesty strengthen our relationships and are an absolute necessity for love to grow. Both parties to love must open their hearts and share their thoughts and feelings. Equally, both parties must be willing to listen. There are no dictators in love. Trust in each other, show respect, and remember that shared experiences and continued efforts create a powerful bond between lovers.

If you are looking for love, the Lovers card reminds you to be clear about your values and beliefs. Know what you stand for and what you are willing to accept in terms of another’s values. It is really important to remain true to yourself. By being authentic and genuine you allow love to flow your way. If you try to attract a partner by being ingenuine or becoming what you think another wants, that person is merely falling for an image, a fictional character if you will. The real you remains unloved, leading two people to be duped. Remember love is always a choice – yours and theirs – it’s not easy to find, but if it’s something you want in your life it’s worth searching for.

The Lovers card is about choice. You choose not only who you love but how you love. You also have a right to choose not to be in a relationship if you prefer. There’s no wrong or right, just be clear about your personal beliefs and values. Be the best version of yourself, be open to loving others, receiving love and loving yourself. All facets of love are equally important. Allow yourself to let go of ‘false love’: dominance, control, selfishness, and of course abusiveness of any kind. We all deserve more.

Character traits: genuine, giving, receptive, open, honest, true, authentic, hopeful, protective, fair, worthy, patient, astute, self-controlled, loving.

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